Service for one

Service for one
Originally uploaded by lunita.

So I am told that priority number one should be meeting my basic needs and living my life.

Priority two, stop feeling guilty for things beyond my control. Like the rain for example. Not my fault. Though it did convince me of the wisdom of staying in on a Friday night. I was trying to convince myself to go out dancing, but I have too much work to do, and tickets to a choral concert tomorrow, and so...

Zany senior member of my department and I hijacked our work and took it on the road, planned on having sushi but were ultimately convinced by the gods of self indulgence to eat bacon instead. Yes. Not Pancetta, nothing fancy, just pure, good old fashioned bacon. (On a cheeseburger, of course.) I mitigated the guilt about things within my control by taking a two hour walk and making doctor's and dentist's appointments, getting my eyes checked after I.'s parent/teacher conference.

I remember still what parent/teacher conferences were like when Sheila would have me come in with Mom and Dad and they would talk about me and ask me to draw a straight line between two points. That was back when work was under contractual agreement (which may indeed explain my need for quid pro quo setups) I did three years worth of math in one year because I loved it. I don't know what possessed me to be a woman of letters. I suppose I still have time to bail. One of my many secret wishes, the ones that hide in the back of the closet when I sift through for something presentable yet comfortable to wear, was to have been a physicist. I think it may be too late for me now. Another was, of course, to be a singer, not a diva, not really, just a quirky ol' folksinger would have done me just fine... But my fingers are too torpes to play the guitar, and there is not much market, let's face it, for a solo artist with no art. But thinking on this whole solo flying mission (the ophtalmologist said my eyes are almost perfect, but teased that if I want to become a night pilot, I might want to wear my glasses) I decided to actually treat myself to a nice dinner cooked by my very own loving hands. So, seeing as how the salmon I purchased the other night was beckoning, and who better to eat it than me (as no one else could be enticed)? I figured, hell, I'll be creative, for once.

So I salted it, just right, sprinkled a dusting of curry over the top and baked with an apricot preserve glaze. Meanwhile I peeled the skins from previously boiled potatoes, in a lazy and altogether inefficient manner, thinking about how if anyone else were there watching me, they would be irked by my absolute unprofessionalism and I smiled to myself, thank god I'm alone. Once I diced the potatoes into reasonably bite size cubes, I diced a boiled egg and dusted the two with salt, for the dressing I made a scallion, curry mayonaise, with a dash of salt, lemon and sugar. Magnificent. And, for the ultimate balance that is never missing from my mother's table, the appropriate proportion of green leafy vegetables (an herb mix), with halved cherry tomatoes for a splash of color, and of course a balsamic vinaigrette. There are still days that I think I might prefer to be a chef, than an academic, or a writer (ha!). So I take pictures to commemorate my evening, and to add to my archive of food pornography, and I write just a little, to process my day, before going back to my work, the neverending procession of papers and tests and...
Maybe I'll just go take a hot shower instead.