Adventures in aggression (or why do these things always happen to me?)

So I took I to the dentist the other day, and instead of the young Indian man who usually attends to her, it was a much older one, who walked past the exam room with open doors twice, as if checking me out. I. played quietly in the chair, drawing pictures in my notebook, I stood huddled in the corner, hair still wet, hunched over a pile of papers that I am feverishly grading as I slide into the home stretch.

"you the mother?" he asks gruffly, and my hackles are instantly raised.
"isn't it obvious?"
"No, you look more like her sister." I smile sarcastically at this.
"No. There's a good twenty years between us."

I act my most business-like and he is demeaning and condescending. A few minutes pass and I studiously ignore him, speak comforting words of Spanish to her, to his irritation, he doesn't seem to understand. He asks how many other children I have. I glare and reply only one.

"She is very beautiful." he comments, he is watching me, instead of her as he says this, he is not treating her very nicely, though the more I talk to him, the nicer he gets to her.
I glibly reply, "must be the father."
He snorts, almost amused by my hostility.
"I get that about my kids a lot," he continues, stopping to scold I. for closing her mouth thereby making him take longer.
"hmmh." I grunt.
Reach out and touch her foot, "todo estará bien, mamita..." I blow her kisses and she blinks acknowledgment back at me.
"What?"
"No I was just telling her it would be fine."
"My kids," he continues... "I have kids too, I know how it is."
Funny, I don't feel any solidarity.
"They actually look like my wife."
"Yeah," I look up for a moment from the grading again, "she actually looks a lot like me when I was a kid, save for the coloring."
"Oh..." he tries to be casual, "Is that your natural hair color?"
"um hmmmn." I turn back to my work, read a few more essays, pull my hair from my face, bite on the tip of the pen, sigh heavily.
"Everything ok?"
"Yeah, just bad writing."

He asks about my job and I give barebones details, in my most teacherly way. He asks about the quality of the undergrads, poses questions with vaguely racist undertones, his assistant, an hispanic man, shoots me amused and exasperated looks. I am annoyed because he berates his underling and complains to him that the doctor before screwed up and how the business was going to take a loss. His assistant never answered. He explains in an aside to me that I shouldn't pay attention, that what he is talking about is only for them. He then explains that she will be getting a "good" filling for free, and I explain that I would much rather have had them do the job right the first time. We stare in silence. His assistant smirks, turning his face away. The doctor hastily finishes up and I have serious doubts as to whether he even finished the job, and put in the fillings that I did pay for. Before I leave I take advantage of their disorganization and I ask for photocopies of her dental records, filed away, just in case. (Always good to build one's case before evidence can be destroyed).

And then, as I write this, meditating on (some) men and their lack of couth, I hear a little blip on my screen and the following person appears, with an icon of a motorcycle and a location of Italy, with a blurb that reads "Hasta la victoria siempre" trying to contact me in a chat. I agree because one never knows if one knows someone, and the following ensues.

marcio 3/17/07 3:51 PM
hi
ilanaluna 3/17/07 3:52 PM
do I know you?
marcio 3/17/07 3:52 PM
I don't know?
ilanaluna 3/17/07 3:52 PM
so?
marcio 3/17/07 3:52 PM
So what? (blushing smiley)
ilanaluna 3/17/07 3:53 PM
there must be something you want to say
3/17/07 3:53 PM
so say it
marcio 3/17/07 3:53 PM
...umm
ilanaluna 3/17/07 3:53 PM
más facil en español?
marcio 3/17/07 3:53 PM
no ok english
3/17/07 3:53 PM
I'm italian
ilanaluna 3/17/07 3:54 PM
so it says
marcio 3/17/07 3:54 PM
33 years old
3/17/07 3:54 PM
you
ilanaluna 3/17/07 3:54 PM
not italian, not 33
3/17/07 3:54 PM
che
3/17/07 3:57 PM
so I guess it wasn't me that you were looking for (smiley)
marcio 3/17/07 4:03 PM
sorry
ilanaluna 3/17/07 4:03 PM
LOL
3/17/07 4:03 PM
for what?
marcio 3/17/07 4:03 PM
I'm boring you
ilanaluna 3/17/07 4:03 PM
no you are amusing me
3/17/07 4:04 PM
but I don't understand how or why you contacted me
3/17/07 4:04 PM
do you know someone with my name?
3/17/07 4:05 PM
or did you find me from one of my sites?
3/17/07 4:09 PM
what are you sending me?
marcio 3/17/07 4:09 PM
look
ilanaluna 3/17/07 4:09 PM
no, tell me
❦
marcio inviato il file "194.jpg" ai membri di questa chat
3/17/07 4:10 PM
marcio 3/17/07 4:10 PM
flower

[here my curiosity is piqued, he sent the file twice, the blue and white stripes blink across the bar as if it were a sideways pole dance, is it really a "flower" or would it be an unsolicited pornographic display, a cyber-perv flashing open his brown trenchcoat? My curiosity hovers, but I imagine that despite I have a mac there might be some sort of spyware or trojan horse virus and no trojan pastic barrier to protect poor little Lucy. My fear of infection outweighs my desire for free porn (it could be amusing after all and very little offends my sensibilities save for real physical aggression) so I let the blue swirl maddeningly and continue...]

ilanaluna 3/17/07 4:10 PM
why?
marcio 3/17/07 4:10 PM
for you that ìs all
3/17/07 4:10 PM
if you want
ilanaluna 3/17/07 4:10 PM
I need to understand why you wanted to talk.
3/17/07 4:11 PM
before I accept anything...
3/17/07 4:11 PM
rules of the game
marcio 3/17/07 4:11 PM
be quiet
ilanaluna 3/17/07 4:11 PM
why?
marcio 3/17/07 4:12 PM
ok bye! (smiley wave)
ilanaluna 3/17/07 4:12 PM
ok


So, I scratch my head in bemusement, and I cancel the petitions for file transfer. No curiosity will kill this cat. I wonder what makes people think that they have the right to demand (or is it sheer maladjustment?) and I laugh because I need nothing, nothing at all. My cup it runneth over.