Epiphany number 1

I have had one! Just one. Maybe not really one. But it felt like one five minutes ago.

Ok, so my scalp and forehead are hurting :( , and I thus haven't accomplished the work that I was supposed to, but the night is still young...

So here is the epiphany: I am not a sociologist. (no that isn't it) but I am always attracted to research that has *nothing* to do with my field of expertise (which, btw, right now is non-existent), so I had to meditate on some sort of project that would involve socio-linguistics, so that I can specialize, thereby making myself ultimately more marketable (not the real reason, of course), for the teaching methodolgy course that I am suffering through. I say suffering, but it is more like, laughing my ass off b/c the prof is hysterically funny, so even if all the reading is nauseatingly boring (b/c I have sat through far too many staff-development seminars and education classes, and b/c it is not really interesting ) I still generally leave class feeling purged of negative energy.

Still no epiphany... it is coming... I promise...

drumrolls...

My project is going to relate to the discourse lag (and its effect on personal / intimate relationships). Meaning of course... why the fuck people in bi-lingual / bi-cultural relationships can't fucking understand one another... I thought that So Cal might be a relatively split-relationship rich area, and that way, I can limit the scope of my research to say, heterosexual couples, with one American partner and one Spanish-speaking (or do I limit it just to Mexican?) partner. What specific modes of discourse see the most communication break-down? What language dominates... etc. No doubt this has been done before, but once I start investigating, I will be able to aproximate an angle that is slightly unique... (and that's all you ever really have to do anyway, right?, variations on a theme, like little lapping waves that make very little actual progress, but make all the academics feel really good, 'cause nobody dares contradict them...)

This is horribly vague, and probably way beyond my capacity (either intellectually or experientially). But, I bet the results would be fascinating and very telling. Perhaps I could limit it further to this particular set of circumstances in the University community? Would the pool be large enough? So who cares that I am not equipped to do this sort of thing?! This is how it ties in to my literary research: I have been fascinated with the idea of linguistic exile, and of writing in a language other than the mother tongue, for very personal reasons, and I think that the research that would necessarily go into me creating this proposal (let's not even imagine that this would then turn into an actual project - highly unlikely) would be immensely helpful, at worst just for emotional clarity and at best, providing a theoretical framework for the analysis of some works that I have been wanting to approach.

Did you discern the epiphany? No? Oh right, I haven't put it in yet. This is it: personal tragedy and pain can be turned into a useful fuel for purely academic research. A broken heart can indeed have corrolary benefits, a massive crash and burn can inspire...see Diane Vaughn- "Uncoupling" which I will be taking out of the library post-haste.