Shopping for porcupine...

Well, I might as well have been. Is it so wrong to want fresh pesto that has pine nuts instead of walnuts? I am inordinately disenchanted with Trader Joe's today... even though I got 4$ Australian Shiraz, lox, chocolate-covered soy nuts, hummus, capers, brie, armenian string cheese, olives, pickles of varying species, crumbled gorgonzola, pierogies, tri-color tortellini, gnocchi, almond butter, nutella, TLC crackers and more...

Let's just say that shopping for food to pamper yourself, and then not finding the one item that you *really really* wanted, well it sucks. So now I have a closet full of ideas and no desire to do anything with them. (although crepes with capers, cream cheese and lox might happen) I even forgot the cilantro (after remembering the ginger) to make winter squash soup AND the water has boiled way down as I read through pages of writing, not the writing I was supposed to be looking at, mind you...

Why do I even bother to get out of bed some days? I am cranky and bitchy and altogether unpleasant today, so I now choose to take leave of myself (can I do that? please?) and perhaps wash some dishes before doing the work that I won't be finishing today, even though I promised myself that I would:( It must be true, that becoming machines would be an infinitely more *intelligent* thing to do... no pain, no comprehension of what it feels like to be surrounded by the deafening roar of the waves, or dwarfed by the ancient redwoods... or locked inside a brain that won't turn off! But... I think we all know why we do the things we do, because of our unflagging belief in the *humanity* of our universe.

This could be filed as my first ranting (I thought it might be good to add one, given that it is in the sub-title and all:)